What I Would do with my Lottery Earnings.


I am really sore.  Like ridiculously sore.  12512311_10100697279453363_6901348544062139_n

I taught a Body Pump class first thing in the morning so I could do my “video” for Les Mills. We all call it “videos” despite the fact that that language alone makes you a strong candidate to be old, but apparently, none of us really seem to mind that a whole heck of a lot. Anyhoo, I did that class at 6am, and I’m really trying this whole morning thing out. The hard thing with that is that I’m still not getting to bed at a great time, so I’m also trying to get in bed at decent hours. I got in bed last night before midnight and am not yet falling asleep at my desk, so maybe this is a win?

So, I’m sure you’ve heard and heard and heard again how intense this Powerball thing is getting here.  The winnings are estimated at up over a billion dollars, and it makes it tempting to play.  I mean, even celebrities are getting in on it, which I sort of resent, but whatever.  I

I  haven’t played, and not sure if I will, but in my off time, I’ve sort of fantasized about what it might be like if I won, right?  And it really isn’t an interesting or particularly noble list, it’s practical.  Maybe that’s selfish.

I’d pay off my student loans.  Probably pay off my sister’s and pay off a few friends.  If you were to sit with us over drinks or coffee, eventually, student loans would come up.  “Hey guys, I better head out.  I’m watching the budget – these loans!”  It would be nice to hang out with friends my age and not have this thing just hanging over our heads.

I’d put $2-$3 million away for our retirement.  Sounds lofty now, but totally manageable if you win the powerball right?  Then we don’t have to worry about outliving our retirement like our parents kind of have to cause they live long af.

Housecleaner.  I am a terrible housekeeper.  I would LOVE some help.  Maybe that makes me a brat, but if I had the money this very individual second, I would totally do it.

Chef.  I would love a chef whose special talent was to make my favorite terrible foods healthy.  And all my favorite healthy foods in their proper portions so I only had to do it (cook) for enjoyment and not for sustenance or making sure I had lunch for the next day.  The biggies for me would be big elaborate salads, soups, and sushi.  I would LOVE to always have sushi on tap.

What would you do if you won the Powerball?

I had a total meltdown.

I came home on Thursday night SORE.

My throat was sore.

My body was sore, on account of the fact that I woke up to run 4 miles with a coworker, and then I taught class around 6:30.  And I fantasized about the bath I would take that night, complete with a book with actual pages, and epsom salts.

So I turned on the water, and this is what happened.



If you can’t tell what exactly is going on here, I can fill you on.  When I turned the water on, water filled with a black ash waterfalled, and I watched, in disbelief, as my clean bathtub started to become smeared and smutty.

And I lost it.

Regina-george-screaming-2-oI called Austin about 4 times.

I texted him.

And then I started to freak out.

My throat hurt. My body hurt. And I couldn’t get my warm bath.

So I screamed. I told Austin that I was going to kick down the door of the front office.  Austin called and asked if I wanted a hotel room to take a bath in.  I said I didn’t and that I’d rather just punch everybody.  I screamed for so long and laid on the floor for so long that Austin looked really worried. And then, like a child who had just thrown the most epic of fits, I fell into a deep sleep.

I threw a fit. And I’m sorry. We live in the greatest nation of the world, and I’m throwing a fit because I can’t take a bath when I want it?  I need to grow up. No, I didn’t get my bath, but I went to sleep in a warm bed, I have folks who care about me, food in my belly, and I think they might have fixed the water. So I might even have a bath. I’m lucky. And happy 🙂