Want to hear something that really made me laugh hard yesterday?
This is so so rude, but I was at home sort of in the middle of the day because I’m on duty Thursday nights, and I was sending some emails and such, and listening to E! in the background, when I realized that they were playing all the episodes of KUWTK involving Kris Humphries in Bora Bora. Now the reason why this is so good and so rude is because clearly, Kim is no longer married to Kris (they only made it 72 days, which Austin and I celebrated as our “Kardashian Anniversary”), and Kimmy was the biggest asshole she’s ever been during the Kris era.
Now this particular scenario was really exquisite because Kris tosses Kim into the ocean…
Causing her head to slam against the ocean’s surface and her to lose her $75k diamond earrings. Instead of being a logical human, Kim begins to whimper, then cry, as she runs to and fro on the dock. When she tells Kourtney whats happening, Kourtney responds by telling her…
The Kris era also ushered in this gem.
I haven’t talked about it much here because of my fear of looking like a complete idiot, but I’m racing for the first time in a while on and it scares the piss out of me. Here are my thoughts before a half marathon.
- Water? I should hydrate. Yes, hydrate. Water. Now. Water, some tea, some seltzer, more water.
- Speaking of water, I should prep my water plan for tomorrow. Where’s my hydration backpack?
- I’m not sure what they’re gonna have on the course, let me make sure that I pack some gels. But gel makes my stomach hurt. Maybe I should ask the chicks at Fleet Feet when I work what I should do.
- What shoes am I going to wear? I don’t think the Glycerin is doing it for me anymore.
- What do I eat for dinner with only a smidgen of fiber so I don’t poo my pants tomorrow.
- Speaking of pants, what am I going to wear? I should lay that out.
- Do I have any Coke around for after the race? Shit. Shit.
- Also, what am I going to eat for breakfast tomorrow?
And then, I commence to not sleeping, or sleeping fitfully all night whilst dreaming that I’ve overslept and missed my race.
How was your weekend? What do you worry about before a big race/event?