We’re getting married in about 7 months ::gulp cause I feel like I haven’t done anything:: and people are at it, asking those rude questions that are none of their business really, or premature.
Literally, hours after we were engaged?
“Have you set a date?”
Why would we have set a date, we literally got done calling our parents 40 minutes ago.
“Are your parents okay with you being interracial?”
Yes. But if they weren’t, do you think I’d share it with you, a total stranger?
“Did you only date white guys before or is this the first?”
First. It’s not like I have some weird fetish.
“Can I be invited? Please?! Can I have a plus one?”
Wasn’t really planning on it. And now you’ve made it very awkward because the venue can only fit a certain amount of people.
But the one that I’ve gotten a few questions on, and the one I’m just not sure on, is the kid question. Do we want kids, and how many? And quite honestly, I can say, we have no idea, and this is the one idea that we’re completely both absolutely sure we’re on the fence about.
I grew up in a big family by today’s standards – there were four of us, and I love being able to tell folks about all my siblings, and the thought of not having a full house is sorta weird, but there are a few things that terrify me, mortally, about kids, and I’m sure I need to get past this before I even think about kids.
- Student loans. Mine are not paid off. And the thought of bringing a child into that mix is chilling.
- Money. In general, kids are spensy, and I’m obsessed with the idea of being extremely financially independent – something we’ll touch on a little later when we talk about my resolutions.
- This is about to sound awful, terrible, and selfish. And I know that, so I’m prepped to get screamed at. But I am a little concerned about my weight and what a baby might do to my body. I’ve been told that once you have a kid, that your priorities shift, and you may not be as concerned with your body. But I sort of like to run. I like to work out. I like my abs and my arms, and I’m worried about how hard it will be to maintain that once I have a kid, or two, or four, like my mom did.
- I mean, Kara Goucher (pictured above) returned to her sexy Olympiad self within a year, but she runs literally like 100 miles a week. Like. How can I even compete? Will my exercise participants take me as seriously if I’m not in tip top?
- What if I suck at it? No backsies when it comes to kids, ya know? And if I suck, I’m screwing a kid up. I can’t live with that!
But at any rate, I figure, we’ll make that decision when the time comes, but for the time being, I’m totally willing to hold your baby for a while, just to borrow, while I decide!
4 thoughts on “Babies on the brain.”
Congrats and good luck. Having just gotten married last year I learned that it is ok to say no. To anything. You owe no explanations. Weddings are expensive and you have to draw the line somewhere. Have fun planning!
Thank you Sarah! I have felt such a wide range of emotions being engaged – from soaring joy that I get to marry Austin, to stress, to disbelief in my own abilities to pull this off. But I need to remember this wedding isn’t about to be featured in Life & Style, and I just don’t need to freak out 🙂
At least you’re thinking about it. Many never do.
And, the baby questions won’t go away for about 20 years. 😦
Well at least I’m hearing these questions aren’t completely bizarre!